Be Empowered Without Being a “B”

by Dominique Currie

If there is one word I absolutely loathe, it is the “B” word. It is used so loosely around social media and sadly, can even be used on television now without a censor. It saddens me to see women (and men!) openly refer to themselves as a “B”, yet become so offended when someone else calls them that. I’m sorry, but if you openly and commonly refer to yourself as this word, then anyone who agrees with you and follows suit is not “calling you out of your name”. 

Ladies, let’s have a little more respect for ourselves. It is not cute for us to call ourselves this word. The word simply means “female dog”. While we love our domesticated canines presently, dogs in the Bible are often symbolic of poverty, lack and disdain. Conversely, God calls women lovely, wise, submissive, respectful, kindhearted, generous, helpful, excellent, gracious, honorable, faithful, trustworthy and agreeable. While these characteristics can almost perfectly define our favorite four-legged companion, these definitions are almost the antithesis of the secular meaning of the word for female dog. This is another way the enemy has taken an innocent word and twisted it into something perverse and unsound. Wikipedia defines this word as “someone who is belligerent, unreasonable, malicious, rudely intrusive, and/or aggressive; and in a feminist context, it can indicate a strong or assertive woman, one who might make men feel threatened. When applied to a man, it is a derogatory term for a subordinate.”

We have come too far as women to allow society to define us this way. I am perfectly capable of being a “strong or assertive woman” without having to be called this word; and furthermore, as a Godly woman, my attitude should not be one that is meant to make a man feel threatened. I would also never use this word to define any man in efforts to emasculate him. I am all for empowering women, but not at the expense of emasculating our men. We need our men to be confident, strong, and mighty as the heads of our households. We run the risk of creating effeminate men when we try to exert our femininity over their masculinity. I am perfectly happy stepping into my role as help meet and allowing my man to be the head of the household just as Christ designed and intended the family unit to be. The enemy knows that if he can cut the giant at the head, the whole body will fall. Basically, if he can continue to attack the family unit by effeminizing our men and thwarting the design that Christ has left for us to follow when it comes to Godly family units, he can get in and wreak havoc. We must continue to play the roles that God designed for us. He did it for our own protection. He knows that any familial unit that is not built after His design runs the risk of failing, and failing quickly. God knows what He is talking about!

A lot of women find it difficult to fall into a submissive role. I also see these same women complaining about their men being too passive –aggressive or effeminate. I want to shake these women and ask them what exactly they want! If you do not want to submit to a Godly man, don’t be surprised when he becomes worn down and allows the woman to take the ungodly lead in the marriage. I would even risk saying that the way a woman treats a man is indicative of how she deals with her Heavenly Father. After all, marriage is an earthly representation of a heavenly relationship. We must tread carefully….

One of my best friends always says that it is not about what we are called, but about what we answer to. This derogatory word has many implied implications, none of them good. Let’s stop using it so liberally and concentrate on being the men and women that Christ has called us to be. It may be meant as a joke or as a symbol of empowerment; but quite frankly, if my Heavenly Father doesn’t see me as a “B”, I refuse to let any mere mortal use that to define me. Period.