"Life just sucks right now!"
Have you ever
said those words or heard them shouted from your spouse? Yesterday morning, a
conversation about groceries with my husband turned into an argument about his
feelings of inadequacy and failure. He sped off down the road after screaming
those words from the car and I didn't get to talk to him the whole day while he
was at work.
We've been living in a very low spot financially for a while
now, and in this season the enemy has occasionally used this fact to convince my
husband that he isn't enough for our family. He's spoken countless lies into my
husband's ear telling him that he isn't a good enough provider, and that the
choices he's made for our family were mistakes.
When my husband left
yesterday, I spent the greater part of two hours crying. Knowing that he was
feeling unworthy and that he felt all alone in it made me feel so helpless. But
I am. There is nothing I can do apart from God to help him see his purpose.
There is no way that my husband can see the Glory in all that he has without
seeking The Lord's guidance.
I don't think the struggles that we face in
our marriage are any different or more difficult than those that every couple
faces. We've been in this tough spot for some time now, and the toll it is
taking on my husband's heart is so hard to endure. As hard as this time has been
and continues to be, I have seen so clearly the way that God created us for each
other. When my husband is in despair, The Lord always gives me hope to share
with him to fix His eyes on Jesus, and when I start to stumble, my husband
reminds me of God's promises.
When I think about where we are and how it
isn't what it could or should be, I think about where we were, and how for God
has brought us! He is sovereign! He is faithful! And no matter how long it
takes, He makes all things new.
Rest in the knowledge today that no
matter what kind of chaos you are living in, there will come birth.