At some point in our lives, we as beautiful, called, and virtuous women will feel less than perfect. This can be due to the opinions of other people, expectations presented to us by society, or simply pressure we put on ourselves to measure up to some ridiculous standard. Much of this pressure is applied to us early in life and continues to mount as we reach adulthood and struggle through disappointments, negative criticism, hope deferred and heartache. Some women have a breakthrough and come to terms with who they are in Christ and seemingly leap into their destiny and live to tell the tale of how they used to have low self-esteem and self-worth.
How do we become like those women?
I believe it has to begin at the conception of our womanhood. It is no secret that there is a direct correlation between childhood experiences and who we are as grown women today. I am not saying that we are given a pass to allow these circumstances to stunt our growth; rather that we are human and these experiences, whether good or bad, have molded us into who we are today.
Proverbs 12:18 states that the words of the reckless pierce like swords. That saying “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?” Yeah, so not true. When someone has said something hurtful to you, it is pretty hard and near impossible to forget. All those times we as young women were told that we were ugly, fat, stupid, mediocre, etc; those words swam around in our psyche whether we believed them or not. What’s worse is that if we did not have positive reinforcement coming back at us as quickly as the negative words were flying at us, we may have just began to believe it a little. Proverbs 18:21 says that death and life are in the power of the tongue, and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof. Words are illustrated as fruit which means that they were first seeds that had to fall on fallow ground, take root and spring up into life.
What is fallow ground? Webster’s Dictionary defines fallow as “cultivated land that is allowed to lie idle during the growing season”. This land is ready to be tilled and is fertile for accepting the seeds for the harvest. Little girls who are journeying into the conception of their womanhood are fallow ground. They are wide-eyed and vulnerable to who they think they are supposed to become as the world tries to consume them and mold them into societal standards. They are at the pinnacle of an influential state; they are watching other women and wanting to emulate those who have what they feel they are lacking. This is the stage in the young girl’s life that we need to prune, cultivate and tend to the harvest. We must encourage, discipline and teach young women that they are more than what society may want to paint them as. We must teach them that they are no man’s play-thing; they are a rare jewel that is to be saved for someone who can recognize their worth. We must be positive role models in which they can fashion themselves after that display meekness, humility, virtue, grace, poise and honorable submission in order to counteract the notions that society presents to our young girls that in order to make it in this world, they must first be rebellious, overtly sexual and must “think like a man” in order to find love, acceptance and success. But above all that, we as women must first believe what we preach to these young ladies. Just as these young ladies are fallow ground, vulnerable to weeds and thorns that may grow among the seeds, we ourselves were once fallow ground, and may have to look back and deal with the weeds and thorns that may have been planted in our lives in order to be all we can be for this next generation.
Mothers, daughters, sisters in Christ; ask God to reveal to you who you are to Him. God created man in His image, but out of man He also created woman in His image. We present a unique facet of God that men do not have. When God tells us in the Bible who we are to be as women, it is because He wants these unique qualities to shine through us and display different aspects of His personality to the world. If you were once a young girl who may have been confused and misguided during the cultivating season of your life, there is no time like the present to ask the Creator of all things to uproot you and plant fresh seeds into your heart so that you may rise out of darkness and spring up into the newness of Christ. The Son will provide you with essential nutrients so that you can thrive in a way that was not possible while your growth was stunted by weeds and thorns. It is then that you can reach back and speak life into another little girl who may be strangled and choked by weeds. Imagine a world where each and every woman of God knew their worth. The lengths in which Christ could use us would be insurmountable. Let’s do it!
Dominique Bradley loves God and is embracing her new role as wife and First Lady to her husband Matthew, a Youth Pastor. She operates in the healing, deliverance, and prophetic ministry alongside him as well. She applies biblical standards to both her social and political life and is an advocate for the Pro-Life movement. You can connect with Dominique on Instagram @theniqueshow4.
Posts
