Have you
ever really wanted to save someone? The dear friend dealing with depression; the
family member who is battling cancer; the loved one who cannot seem to catch a
break. When we see others hurting, many of us tend to have a desire to swoop in
and somehow or some way save the day Instead, however, we must retire the
red superhero cape. There
is only one Savior, after all, and it is not you.
Salvation comes no other way; no other name has been or will be given to
us by which we can be saved, only this one. (Acts 4:12 MSG)
Watching the people
we love suffer can stir up many emotions within ourselves. I cannot stand it; I lose sleep and
end up racking my brain for a solution and, when a solution does not come, I
become sad and frustrated for my loved one. It is during such times that I
cannot help but wonder, "What do you do
when someone you love is hurting, suffering, and fighting a seemingly
relentless battle?"
You can't save people, you can only love them. -Anais Nin
Love
people. Let people know they are loved and shine God's
light into their lives, even when it is difficult or it does not seem to be
sinking in.
For God, who said,
"Let light shine out of darkness," made his light shine in our hearts
to give us the light of the knowledge of God's glory displayed in the face of
Christ. (2 Corinthians 4:6 NIV)
In addition to loving
people, it is also important to be mindful of your emotions. Our emotions can be a challenge when we
love someone, but being mindful of our emotional state is vital. Our
presence should be calming instead of anxious or overly emotional; it should
bring peace instead of chaos. Do not minimize or magnify someone's
experience or suffering. Know when to be there and when to leave.
Speak the truth. Speak love and life into those who are hurting and speak it gently (Proverbs
15:4, ESV).
You can't save people from themselves. You can only try to wake them up. -Karen Marie Moning
Allow God to work in the lives of
His children. Often times,
people must face emotional things one on one with God. Do not impede the
process by trying to make a shortcut that God never intended for someone to
take. People may need to face their hurts directly with God and, often times,
this is an extremely difficult process. With this in mind, what you may
think is helping someone may actually be harming them. God sees the future
and we only see the present, so allow God to do what He does best; heal, love
and direct. God reminds us
that He has those we love, those we are worried about, those that we cannot
help but desperately want to. Leave the end results
to Him.
Focus on
listening instead of fixing. You can be there for someone
without actually trying to control or fix their situation or circumstances. You
know you are fulfilling the role of the listener when you do not feel
emotionally drained by listening and loving them. Loving and listening to
someone should not leave you feeling drained. There will certainly be
times where we become a witness to another’s pain and battles, but when we are
secure in who God is and what He can do, we will not become entangled in their
pain or circumstances.
Pray for them. Intercessory
prayer is the act of praying to God on behalf of others. We
are called and needed to stand in the gap. If possible, pray with multiple
people.
Again, truly I tell you that if two
of you on earth agree about anything they ask for, it will be done for them by
my Father in heaven. (Matthew 18:19 NIV)
The older I become, the more I
realize that I must retire the red superhero cape I once wore. In my times
of weakness and impatience, I try and pull the cape out and put it back on,
only to fall when I try to fly. I am thankful that I do not have the
responsibility of saving people. Because of this, my life is more freeing and
safe.
"Not all superheroes wear
capes...mine wore a cross."
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